Koblahai

Hello stranger....so you want to know more about me? Well, brace yourself, it's an ugly story. I was born on the steppes of Hulm VII. My father was a manic depressed goat herder and my mother a jovial goat. It never bothered me much. What bothered me was my father's feelings for my pony. I drew a line there and one night I knocked him on the head with a keg of fermented Llama milk and promptly left the yurt. Hanging around the steppes as a down and out teen ager isn't what it's cracked up to be, so I hitched a ride out of system on a rusty freighter bound for an unfortunate sun dive later on. Before the tub burned, I was luckily kidnapped by Babel, a mad scientist who needed me for experiments. That was fine with me, but I wasn't ready for the religious epiphany that changed my life, cleansed my brain and made me wash my feet once a week. It's name was Big Dave and it looked like a very large veldspar asteroid, but we were not fooled by the clever disguise.