Ta'jek

Veteran of the Battle for Caldari Prime YC 115

"This is not the dork you are looking for"
" Move along"

" In space no one can hear your ship creak"
unknown Minmatar pilot.


"If I hide wrecks from overview, can I still see Minmatar ships?"
unknown Amarrian pilot

Minmatar ships are never actually destroyed. They just break up into several smaller Minmatar ships.



"A Caldari man, a Gallente man and an Amarr woman are all on an Interbus shuttle. The pilot gets on the speaker and tells them "hi folks, just so you're aware, we're experiencing intermittent capacitor problems. The lights in the passenger compartment might fail briefly. Please don't be alarmed when it happens."

Sure enough a few minutes later, the lights go out. In the brief darkness, there's a smooching sound and a slap, and when the lights come back up the Gallentean is nursing a bruised jaw.

The Amarrian is thinking: "That Gallente creep must have tried to steal a kiss from me in the dark and kissed the Caldari accidentally. Serve him right!"

The Gallentean is thinking: "What the hell? I guess that Caldari must have kissed the Amarrian and she slapped me in the dark by mistake. Bastard!"

The Caldari is thinking: "This is great! I hope the lights go again so I can make that smooching sound and smack the Gallente again!"


Gallente pilot takes his Iteron Mark IV into the State War Academy on Uitra VI Moon 4 to get repairs. While he's waiting, he goes across the space station to get some ice cream. Gallente pilots love ice cream. When he returns, the mechanic says "It looks like you blew a seal". "No" says the Gallente pilot,"That's just a little ice cream".