Steve Cranberry

Gallente if you've got some hair on your chest and fly with a bottle of whiskey not far from your side
Caldari if you're seated on an ergonomic piece of ikea furniture, in a minimalist top-floor office downtown in a major metro area, and you tell your receptionist to "hold all my calls and cancel my 3:00, i've got a 10/10 to run". And you're probably sipping a cosmo or maybe wine coolers
Minmitar if you just rolled a fat blunt. You haven't showered in weeks. You're not sure whether you paid the gas bill this month or maybe the heater is just broken. Either way you make sure to pay power and internet on time
Amarr if you're very diligent when it comes to making your bed. Everything in your house is just so, exactly in its right place, all i's dotted and all t's crossed. You ingest a pre-determined amount of calories each day and occasionally a few mL of red wine are on the menu (they say it's good for your heart). On christmas and easter the slaves chained up in your basement get a cup too.